Your New Career Plan: Go To Jail For Bribery, Get Busted Taking Drugs, Be Appointed Chair Of Samsung

Here's an unconventional career plan for you to consider:

  • Participate in an influence-peddling scheme that helps to oust a head of state;
  • Cop a five-year jail sentence for bribery stemming from that scheme;
  • Be indicted for your role in a merger that cemented your power;
  • Further cloud your reputation by filing careless paperwork about your financial affairs, earning a severe rap over the knuckles from financial authorities;
  • Take multiple doses of an anaesthetic that has legitimate uses, but is notorious for being abused in pursuit of certain exotic intimate personal experiences;
  • Be appointed chair of one of Earth's mightiest electronics companies.

The Register suggests that path to advancement because it worked for Lee Jae-yong, scion of the family that runs Samsung who was indeed yesterday named executive chairman of the company. In the announcement of the appointment, Samsung stated: "The board cited the current uncertain global business environment and the pressing need for stronger accountability and business stability in approving the recommendation."

That's more or less the same reason South Korean authorities pardoned Lee: his family's ties to Samsung mean he's better positioned than anyone else to provide the company with strong leadership needed to navigate the nervous economic moment in which the world finds itself. Even with the dodgy dealings in his past.

He did go to jail, after all. That's accountability for you, right there.

Anyway, he has quite a challenge before him. Samsung Electronics yesterday reported record revenue but a nasty dip in profits, weak demand across most of its product lines, and economic uncertainties that make it hard to forecast immediate improvements.

Samsung is far from alone in producing a gloomy outlook: in recent days The Register has reported similar forecasts from SK hynix, Meta, Google, and Seagate. ®

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